Male Beauty Standards & POV

I realize that I’ve addressed this topic a few times on this magazine site, but I feel compelled to continue empowering individuals to embrace themselves. I love people. I work with a lot of people being a spiritual teacher and a life coach.

Yet sometimes it’s very hard to divide the job because there are people who only want just a life coach and not someone with more of a spiritual foundation, whereas most of the people that come to know me, eventually go down the deeper path with me because of what I teach in regards to enlightenment and spiritual advancement.

It’s a gift for me, being able to answer existential questions for people. I have seen a lot of people that have suffered with lack of confidence. I’ve seen what that does to people, the choices that it can cause them to make, the emotions that it comes with. In my love for human beings, I wish I could fix everybody’s hurting. But since I can’t, I at least try to show them the things that cause the pain in the first place, so that they can try to work on things. And not only with me, but on their own.

Nothing pains me more than witnessing others harboring feelings of hatred within themselves. They often fail to recognize their own beauty, influenced by a world filled with marketing and propaganda that leads them to doubt their worth. And this doesn’t only impact women.

Males are effected too, of all ages.

That’s right! Beauty standards impact not only women but also men, whether we want to admit it or not. If you scroll through social media on any platform today, you’ll find countless men promoting a specific body type. Many of these individuals resort to steroids and other harmful substances, setting a troubling example for younger males who look up to them.

Before sharing my own experience from an experiment I conducted, let’s revisit the conversation about beauty standards for a moment.

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Beauty Standards

Living in a world where beauty standards are set high and people are taught to distinguish between what is beautiful and what is ugly, we certainly miss out on the true essence of beauty. As I have mentioned before, in ancient times, women who were more voluptuous were considered more beautiful because they represented fertility. Then, in the 1980s, the beauty standard shifted to extremely thin, blonde women. Moving into the late 2000s, dark-haired, voluptuous women made a comeback. Now, the beauty standard has shifted again, this time focusing on athleticism and low body fat percentages.

Many women have invested significant amounts of money in Brazilian butt lifts due to the influence of curvier figures. Just imagine how many individuals have undergone procedures to enhance their backsides, inspired by celebrities like the Kardashians, Cardi B, and many others. However, now we see a trend of people removing those enhancements! In fact, I have heard that many celebrities are opting to remove their facial fillers and are focusing on a more slenderized body through health and fitness.

There’s a resurgence of promoting straight blonde hair, like with Beyoncé and the Kardashians (2024/2025) which is driving society into a frenzy. How can anyone keep up with all these changes?

The truth is, nobody can.

The heavens want you to realize that you are being misled into spending your hard-earned money. Once you begin to chase one beauty standard, you find yourself hooked, investing in hair color, wigs, plastic surgery, aesthetics, and even clothing brands. Then, when the beauty standards shift again, everyone races to conform, which ultimately diminishes self-esteem. Social media has been shown to erode confidence and lead to depression, as everyone tries to present a perfect image while adhering to impossibly high standards. People are forgetting to be themselves and are caught in an endless trap of trying to please others rather than embracing their authentic selves. Heaven sees beauty in everyone. There is nothing more important to the heavens than witnessing individuals with true confidence.

We’re not talking about vanity. It’s okay to fix something you don’t like or that has been damaged. However, why continue to chase trends that will inevitably fade?

People buy endless amounts of clothing, only to find them out of style, and then they rush to buy more that is currently in vogue. It’s a ridiculous cycle of consumerism. Personally, I shop at thrift stores and never throw out clothing unless it’s simply unwearable. I choose to wear what I want, what I feel looks good on me, and what makes me feel good. Plus, styles come and go, and many eventually make a comeback.

I hold onto what I have and appreciate it because I recognize it as a blessing. I shop at thrift stores, and I don’t own name brands, really. I did buy a Coach handbag that was used from the thrift store once, for $20 though!

Style comes and goes in terms of fashion trends. Therefore, I just shop cheap and I keep whatever I have, knowing it might make a comeback. Why chase names? Brands are only just the name slapped with a heavy price tag. Plus, clothing has always been a problem for me. This meat suit that I live in called a physical body, has often weighed me down, and clothes only just add to that. I wish I could just wear what I want, but I have to be an upstanding role model.

At home I don’t like to wear much at all. That is, unless the little ones are around. I live a truly modest life. Anyone who has seen my home, would know that. I haven’t changed much in the last 20 years. I was born blonde, and my hair remained blonde.

I don’t really have a lot of money to begin with, but even if I did, I would still live humbly like this. That’s because I don’t fall into the propaganda, beauty standards or namebrand trends that are a part of the greater industry of consumerism. Neither should you.

Chasing today’s beauty standards has brought so many people down, contributing to an increase in suicides. Many individuals have incredible ideas but hesitate to share them online due to fears of looking too old or not pretty enough, or because they dread encountering rude comments intended to belittle them. It’s truly disheartening. There’s so much vanity in our culture that even kind inquiries can provoke attacks.

But yet, its not only women who are targetted. Men are too.

I once encountered a man who was using steroids. I didn’t know him personally and he wasn’t a client of mine. I found him, having discovered his page through another health influencer that I was trying to support because I knew he was genuine. This led down a rabbit hole of of discovering other influencers who also promoted an unrealistic image. I wondered why they went so extreme. Did women like it? Did they desire that appearance for themselves? The steroids were harmful on health, and changed their demeanor to an angry character at times. Some, were even violent with their girlfriends.

After conducting a small survey with women about their perceptions of what they thought of as a handsome man, I realized that there was something more to this propaganda than met the eye. Social media was promoting steroid use, thus setting standards even for men! I recognized that many young men were harming their bodies because of these influencers. They were injecting drugs and jeopardizing good relationships, because they were so focused on achieving a specific body type. But was that really so important?

I interviewed a few young male influencers via email, asking what drove them in that direction. Most cited other influencers they had admired. When I inquired about their motivation for wanting to look a certain way, they expressed that it made them feel good about themselves and that they believed it would attract women.

I then asked women what they found attractive in terms of body type and build. Most women indicated that they didn’t care much about a man’s appearance; rather, they valued emotional support and how he treated them.

Women And What They Are Attracted To

For those who did mention physical preferences, many said they were more concerned with an attractive face and common interests than with body type. Most women preferred dark-haired men over those with lighter features, although some liked blondes and auburn-haired individuals. When I asked if they found the steroid-induced, champion bodybuilder look attractive, many stated that it was unappealing because it appeared excessive. They commented on the bulging veins and bulkiness, indicating it simply wasn’t their type. A few were attracted to the body builder look. And that’s perfectly acceptable!

People are entitled to their preferences, but I didn’t see this muscular ideal reflected in the broader responses that I received.

I also reached out to individuals outside spiritual communities to see if openness to body type was limited to specific groups. The results showed that, overall, women did not care much about body type. Some expressed that a little muscle was nice, but they didn’t appreciate an overly muscular physique.

When I conducted my studies, I approached the bodybuilder’s page and kindly asked him why he wanted to look that way. I shared my view that many women preferred a different aesthetic and inquired why he chose to pursue that extreme. Unfortunately, he wasn’t open to discussion. A wave of people began attacking me, hurling unkind names my way. I hadn’t approached him in a mean-spirited manner; I was simply curious about his personal goals. I hoped to foster an open dialogue, but instead, I was met with hostility and judgment, all for asking a question!

I myself am always transparent. I write about everything that I do in my life openly, even on a personal level. This way people who really do want to work with me get to know me , and understand me. I wouldn’t want anyone to ever get the wrong opinion, and I always come from the heart.

These days, it’s challenging to voice opinions on social media. It seems they want you to have an opinion, but if it doesn’t align with the majority, you’re met with outrage.

The point I want to make is that beauty standards are being set impossibly high. While some companies promote embracing diversity, I often see efforts pushing extreme standards that aren’t achievable for most without significant financial resources. Let’s face it; not everyone has that luxury.

Whatever happened to self-acceptance?

As I mentioned in one of my YouTube videos, my body transformed drastically after surgeries to give birth to my children. Three C-sections and four children left me scarred, and I dealt with hernias and pain. My body was out of proportion, yet I felt young enough to enjoy my life after dedicating myself to selfless service as a parent. I chose to have surgery to address a few concerns, but I aimed to stay within the limits of what the surgeon believed would suit me, as if I had never had children.

Admittedly, the surgeon may have made my top a little too large, but I still try to record my videos from the shoulders up to avoid sending the wrong message.

Regardless, I wish that I was able to fully embrace I wear what I like, and express myself freely. However, people can be overly sensitive; someone even reported my content for displaying a bit of cleavage on TikTok!

In any case, I encourage everyone to embrace who they are and who they aspire to be. If you’re not yet where you want to be, love the self you are in right now. I have loved myself through every imperfection, even when I didn’t feel perfect on the outside.

I had to remind myself that my nose, while large, is the nose that God gave me. I had to accept that my lips, though full, are the lips God intended for me. Thankfully, many people appreciate fuller lips, so it worked in my favor!

However, I did struggle to accept the changes my body underwent due to hernias and pregnancies. I still wanted to feel good about myself in a bathing suit. Regardless, I have always embraced who I am; even if I couldn’t have surgery, I would still find happiness in myself.

The Game Of Influencers

Industries thrive on undermining your confidence and self-esteem, and that’s something to be outraged about. As someone who matters, you deserve to feel good about yourself. Yet, advertisements, commercialism, and celebrity culture often push you toward self-doubt and dissatisfaction. By promoting narrow standards of beauty and idealized images, society encourages you to dislike yourself as you strive to meet these unrealistic expectations.

Consider the phenomenon I call the “Kylie Jenner virus.” While Kylie is undeniably beautiful and has a significant following, many young girls idolize her based solely on her looks, heavily influenced by the glamor surrounding her. I’ve seen countless girls at the mall emulating her outfits, as showcased on “Keeping Up with the Kardashians,” even in casual settings. Although I don’t closely follow celebrities myself, I’m aware of their impact on those around me.

Similarly, men are also pressured to conform to specific ideals. Fitness influencers promote unattainable body types that often require the use of drugs to achieve. Figures like the “Tren Twins” and Noel Diesel exemplify this trend, while others, such as “Big Boy” from “Strength Cartel,” perpetuate these standards. Initially, I respected Will Tennyson for his natural approach to fitness, but when his friend Simon Goliath Lafontant began endorsing peptides and steroids, it raised questions about authenticity in the fitness community.

There is an influencer who goes by the name of Jon Bravo, whom I do have respect for. He engages with his audience and treats everyone with respect. He’s admitted to using chemicals in the past, but maintains a clean regimen now, and he works on bringing attention to influencers that lie in order to help other people in the fitness community avoid falling into the wrong influences. I don’t pay much attention to any of those people on Youtube. Like I said, they were brought to me by my male clients who looked up to them and asked me about their authenticity.

How many influencers are truly natural? How many are genuinely pursuing their physiques without resorting to harmful substances? These influencers wield significant influence and may not realize the detrimental effects they have on the self-esteem of young viewers. While their achievements are noteworthy, what message does this send to the youth? This issue extends beyond fitness influencers; many WWE wrestlers have also used steroids, impacting impressionable young audiences who look up to them.

Personal Opinion

As a woman, I can resonate with many of the statistics. For me, physical appearance has never been a priority; what truly matters is how a man understands me, his romantic gestures, his care for my family, and the depth of his heart and soul. Being a spiritual teacher, I seek deeper qualities such as virtues and generosity—traits that make someone feel heroic.

In a relationship, caring for one another is a two-way street. Each person should be attentive to the unique needs of the other, even if those needs differ. Love often transcends superficial attraction; as people connect on a deeper level, they can see the beauty of each other’s souls, which can enhance their attractiveness.

I believe many women share this perspective, although younger generations may differ. If asked about my physical preferences, I appreciate someone who is moderately fit, takes pride in animal welfare—likely a vegetarian—shares a love for God, and knows how to present themselves well in various situations. Beyond that, I find that my views align with many women I’ve spoken to.

To The Men…

So, you see guys? Only strive toward fitness to be your best self. Never feel pressured to conform to any standard. Embrace your unique self while always aiming for your healthiest version. The right person will appreciate you for who you are, and there’s no need to fit into any beauty standard or trend.

I hope others can learn to love themselves. If you have goals to make changes or wish to look a certain way, that’s perfectly fine, but always remember to love who you are. you don’t need anyone else to tell you what looks good or doesn’t. And you don’t need to chase after standards that are purposely sat in front of you to get you to spend your money.

Plus, you don’t need to harm yourself with the use of steroids to achieve your goals, for you guys out there who look up to these influencers who do so. Steroids have negative health effects on the body, and eventually do rob you of your life. Is that worth the price of looking a certain way? And do women really even find it attractive anyway? In my studies, the answer is no.

Info On The Negative Effects Of Steroid Use

For anyone interested in understanding the true impact of steroids on health, I’ve compiled some information based on my research. Please take a moment to read below.

Steroid use, particularly anabolic steroids, can lead to numerous harmful effects on both physical and mental health. Physically, users may experience cardiovascular issues such as high blood pressure and increased cholesterol, elevating the risk of heart disease and stroke. Liver damage is also a concern, especially with oral steroids, which can lead to serious conditions like liver cancer.

Hormonal imbalances can occur, causing reduced sperm production and infertility in men, as well as irregular menstrual cycles and masculinization in women. Skin problems like acne and infections are common, and psychological effects can include increased aggression, mood swings, depression, and anxiety, especially during withdrawal. In adolescents, steroid use can stunt growth by prematurely closing growth plates. Additionally, while some believe steroids aid recovery, they can actually increase the risk of injuries due to muscle strength outpacing tendon and ligament strength. Overall, the risks associated with steroid use can have lasting impacts on health and well-being.

You are amazing just as you are, and I’m sure that as you work on your goals, you’ll become even greater. Trends come and go, but your health only lasts this life.

May you be blessed dear reader. Love who you are. You’re already amazing.